From Vanity Fair Daily:
The Oscars: Play the “In Memoriam” Montage Pool!
By S.T. VanAirsdale
Despite a strike-shortened preparation period and a handful of unsettled categories, I’m anticipating the same minimum of surprises from this year’s Oscarcast as I have for shows in years past. Nevertheless, I know I can rely on at least one annual segment for a few minutes of guesswork, revelation, and wholly manipulated drama.
Of course I’m referring to “In Memoriam,” the maudlin montage of clips and photos featuring those stars, filmmakers, and other Hollywood figures who passed away in the year since the last Oscar ceremony. Recently satirized here at VF.com, “In Memoriam” in fact yields its own separate culture-within-a-culture for both casual and obsessive viewers alike; expect at least one “She died? Really?” for Jane Wyman, one “He was still alive?” for Marty director Delbert Mann, and never fewer than three “Who?“‘s for the likes of Barry Nelson (the screen’s very first James Bond) or previous Oscar winners like make-up artist William J. Tuttle or The Godfather editor Peter Zinner.
Additionally, if a regular Oscar pool isn’t quite rich enough for your blood, put together a separate, point-based “In Memoriam” ballot for the real high rollers. For example:
Will They Make It? (Choose One)
Norman Mailer (+5)
Merv Griffin (+10)
Charles Nelson Reilly (+15)
Anna Nicole Smith (+20)
None of the above (+15)
Will Open the Montage
Delbert Mann (+10)
Jane Wyman (+10)
Suzanne Pleshette (+15)
Michel Serrault (+20)
None of the above (+5)
Will End the Montage
Heath Ledger (+5)
Jack Valenti (+10)
Roy Scheider (+15)
Deborah Kerr (+20)
None of the above (+25)
Will Get Montage’s First Video Clip
Deborah Kerr (+5)
Laszlo Kovacs (+10)
Peter Zinner (+15)
Jack Valenti (+20)
None of the above (+10)
Will Get Montage’s First Sound Clip
Betty Hutton (+5)
Deborah Kerr (+10)
Brad Renfro (+15)
Roy Scheider (+20)
None of the above (+10)
First Actor/Actress Named
Ulrich Mühe (+10)
Michel Serrault (+10)
Jane Wyman (+15)
Brad Renfro (+20)
None of the above (+5)
First American Director Named
Stuart Rosenberg (+5)
Norman Mailer (+10)
Delbert Mann (+15)
None of the above (+20)
First International Auteur Named
Ousmane Sembene (+5)
Kon Ichikawa (+10)
Michelangelo Antonioni (+15)
Ingmar Bergman (+20)
None of the above (+25)
Oldest Selection
Charles Lane, age 102 (+5)
William J. Tuttle, age 95 (+10)
Michelangelo Antonioni, age 94 (+15)
Jane Wyman, age 90 (+20)
None of the above (+25)
Will Get His Own Montage Elsewhere in Oscarcast
Jack Valenti (+5)
Ingmar Bergman (+10)
Michelangelo Antonioni (+15)
Heath Ledger (+20)
None of the above (+10)
And don’t bother trying to attain a competitive advantage by consulting the Academy—believe me, I tried.
S.T. VanAirsdale is the founder and editor of the New York film culture site The Reeler
Ghoulish predicitons
1998 through 2007
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